Frequently Asked Questions

A therapist works with you to evaluate your past and determine how it has led you to where you are today. A therapist will also focus on healing you from past traumas and assisting you with techniques to manage your fears and insecurities. Though this is important for healthy survival, Robin uses a much broader and more practical strategy to help you decide if your marriage is over — and what to do if it is.

Robin will help you develop an actionable plan to overcome what is holding you back from making the ultimate decision: Is my marriage over? This requires a careful inventory of your worries — financial, parenting, community, and career. Usually, deep down inside, you know what the answer is. It is the practical details that make the decision so difficult — and terrifying.

Therapists are not lawyers, nor are they financial experts. Robin is.

Therapists have not been settling complex custody and divorce matters for years. Robin has.

Though your therapist may have good ideas about how to manage your emotions, they will not know the legal or financial impacts when considering if your marriage is over — and what to do if it is.

Divorce lawyers are trained to strategize for the win. At this tender, early stage of decision-making, however, that is not what you need. If you are asking yourself, “Is my marriage over?”, then a Pre-Divorce Coach is a better choice.

A lawyer’s job is to take down the opponent. In a family situation, though, this rarely has a positive effect on you or your children. The “winner takes all” approach usually results in outrageous attorney fees and, though you might win big on one issue, you will almost surely lose on another.

If you are searching for an experienced professional to help you decide if your marriage is over, a divorce lawyer is not trained for that type of counseling. A lawyer’s job is not to help you make that decision but, instead, to go to battle for you once that decision has been made … if your situation even requires a “battle”.

A Pre-Divorce Coach, on the other hand, will help you answer the question “is my marriage over?”. That is her job. To help you think through, in an organized fashion, all the pros and cons of either staying in your marriage or getting out.

Robin offers one-hour phone or video conference coaching sessions for $200. It usually takes at least an hour to make progress — and we always make progress.

Robin’s fee is about the same as a therapist, but you will also get the benefit of legal, financial, tax, and career support to help you make the best decision for you and your children.

Most clients find relief with just one divorce coaching session. Each session is one hour. A great deal of progress in determining “Is my marriage over?” and “Should I get a divorce?” is accomplished in that time period. Some situations are more complex and require more time. Three sessions is the max for just about all coaching clients to make an informed decision about either repairing their marriage or getting a divorce.

If you are committed to making a good decision for your emotional and financial well being — and that of your children — we guarantee a positive result. Robin’s fresh perspective, and years of experience as a coach, lawyer, mediator, and certified divorce financial analyst, will help you begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel in that first one-hour session.

In our divorce coaching sessions, you will share your marital concerns with Robin. She will ask follow-up questions to clarify your issues. Right from the start, we will begin generating solutions. That fast turn around comes from Robin’s years of experience as a divorce mediator — where honing in on the issues, creating options to resolve problems, and relying on her vast reservoirs of knowledge — has allowed her clients to settle their matters swiftly and fairly.

Robin will help you identify your real, solvable issues. She will offer a variety of perspectives and options to help you build your new life — whether that be with a better marriage or with a clean divorce. Together we will build a step by step plan for you to achieve your goals.

Robin has seen divorces and troubled marriages from all angles. For almost 20 years, Robin has worked as a divorce coach, mediator, attorney, hearing officer, and certified divorce financial analyst. Robin is also the owner of Northern Virginia’s highly respected divorce mediation firm www.grainemediation.com.

Robin has also seen divorce from the inside. She went through a divorce when her kids were seven and nine years old. At that time, she was working as a part-time fitness instructor. Her law career had been on hold for over 10 years. Robin had to deal with all the dilemmas and hurdles that you are experiencing now. The emotional issues and trauma of divorce cannot be minimized. Robin is professionally and personally experienced at helping people balance their emotional needs with practicality and good decision-making skills.

Robin will help you to focus on what is most important. Sometimes even a soured relationship can be turned around. The key to saving a marriage is two-fold: (1) the spouses must really love one another; and (2) both must be willing to put in the effort. Effort means talking about what is important to each other, absorbing that knowledge, and applying it. Effort means learning to truly believe that you cannot change another person. Effort means doing what your partner wants you to do just because you love them … not because you think it makes sense.

If you are teetering on the edge of deciding “Is my marriage over?” “Should I get a divorce?” there is a lot to consider: custody arrangements, the enormous expense of having two homes rather than one, loneliness, blended families, financial concerns, broken dreams, and the daily stress of trying to decide what to do.

You can manage tough situations. You are doing that now! Where Robin can help is in making your situation better. With her expertise and guidance, you will be armed with the knowledge you need to successfully move on to the next chapter of your life.

Should I Get A Divorce?

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